how do you get a shy girl in the youth group not to be afraid to
how do you get a shy girl in the youth group not to be afraid to ask the youth pastor questions in person? the youth pastor emailed me this morning asking for some ideas because a girl in the youth group will text and email him questions but wont ask in person but she is sooo shy so any ideas how to get her to ask in person
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- godsgir...
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- 3 years ago
Answers
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Todd's answer is pretty good. I would add this. If she is willing to ask questions through text and email let her do it and don't worry to much about the rest. A lot of kids wont ask questions at all. |
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I have this same situation. I read her text then wait to see her at youth group and answer her question there and ask if i understood her correctly. It was awkward at first for her but now she talks to me |
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Having him go to her in person and answer the questions might help her get over that fear. He needs to be sure that he keeps things in the open or if need to be private, have another female as a part of, or his wife if he is married. |
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Remember thats she is probably motivated much differently than 90% of your group. She may only feel comfortable talking through the written word. Encourage her to communicate the way she feels comfortable not the way you feel comfortable. In the beginning a shy person is totally scared and behind a computer screen gives them enough distance to feel safe. In person a face to face conversation forces them to think and develop thoughts more rapidly than they are ready for. Behind a computer they can think and develop their appropriate response and not feel pressured or scared! Watch video to see why I have a personal connection to this! |
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The next time the YP sees her, he should confront her and reassure that he got her question then start a conversation. She opened the door, might as well step in. |
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Answer her questions and begin asking her some. If you keep the conversation going it should open the door for you to ask her in person. You will have to be the initiator because shyness is a learned behavior - she has past experience that supports this shyness. |
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Find someone that is willing to connect with the student that is shy. I would encourage to spend time with her after school/church/life. I've noticed that they open up to you when they gain your trust. It could be a trust issue. |
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Personally, I'm usually thrilled when a shy kid txts me, it hard for some to even do that. But if a yp wants to have more personal contact and get a kid to open more, he/she should only answer those questions in person by answering, "I can answer that but it's one of those its easier to anwer in person so come see me next time you're around. Ps just encourage your yp that kids asking questions in any format is a huge win. |






