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questioning my role as youth leader
Ok so I have been youth leader for approx 5 years and yesterday i had a meeting with senior pastor who told me that as a youth leader you must be outgoing and I am a person who is an introvert and always keeping to himself. He says the youths need help and you need to be extroverted to reach them..This was always my personality and I am thinking now that maybe I was never really wired for this calling and might fucntion better somewhere else where my personality will fit in....What do you think I should do?
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- brian
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- 1 year ago
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I know psychology has come leaps and bounds since biblical times (it wasn't even a known field of study then!), but there is no set personality type for ministry. Look at the great ministers of the New Testament. Paul, Peter, Timothy, Barnabas, and Jesus all had their own personalities and ministry style. Jesus spent 3 years mostly with 12 guys (probably by intent), and Paul spent the majority of his life trying to reach as many people as he could. Peter tried to reach the Jews while Paul tried to reach the Gentiles. Barnabas and John Mark both went with Paul and left Paul at different times because of personality conflicts. What I'm saying is God works in us in spite of who we are. don't let someone tell U that UR not cut out for ministry. |
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I know psychology has come leaps and bounds since biblical times (it wasn't even a known field of study then!), but there is no set personality type for ministry. Look at the great ministers of the New Testament. Paul, Peter, Timothy, Barnabas, and Jesus all had their own personalities and ministry style. Jesus spent 3 years mostly with 12 guys (probably by intent), and Paul spent the majority of his life trying to reach as many people as he could. Peter tried to reach the Jews while Paul tried to reach the Gentiles. Barnabas and John Mark both went with Paul and left Paul at different times because of personality conflicts. What I'm saying is God works in us in spite of who we are. don't let someone tell U that UR not cut out for ministry. |
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Being an extrovert doesn't have to mean that you're outgoing and bubbly. And being an introvert doesn't mean that you're always quiet and withdrawn. Introvert and Extrovert are terms that refer to how we 'recharge our batteries'. Introverts, though they may be the most bubbly, outgoing person you ever met, need to retreat by themselves for awhile to recharge and stay balanced. Extroverts recharge by spending time with people, and get drained when they are alone. |
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Im an introvert as well, and I get something to that effect from my sr. pastor often, more so about interacting with the old people in church though. For me its always been about the fact that God doesnt want us to be comfortable, we should be being challenged. Were on this planet to learn more about him. Of course God is going to force us to do things that require using our weaknesses to make us stronger. Give it time and a teachable heart and you can pull through it. It's not like you cant change. |
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My first thought is in the tension between the pastors expectation of you "reaching" and what you are actually doing. If there is no contact at all with the kids then yes, that needs to change. But if he is expecting you to be loud, crazy, and really out there then no. In fact, many youth I know are more turned off by a youth leader like that than one who is more authentic and approachable. If I understand your question correctly, you are not asking if you should be a youth pastor at all but whether this ministry is the right fit. That should be left up to prayer. But if you find that your ideology of ministry is always clashing with the church you are in then that may be a good time to ask if God is preparing you for something else. |
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whether extrovert or introvert...its more about intentionality and truly understanding you call. you can't change how you're wired...that is who God has made you to be and like josh says above you can leverage your weaknesses by inviting other adults who are wired differently. There's a great book i'd encourage you to push through that will help focus where your efforts need to be spent. For me it comes down to 2 questions: Do you love Jesus? and can you love on students with His love? the rest is details. You do have a place in this. Leveraging it, so that you are the best you can be and inviting others into the opportunity is what leaders do. Link Details: 1 year ago
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Just because you are not extremely outgoing or boisterous, please don't think that you are disqualified from youth minister. In areas where I cannot be very extroverted, I try to make up for it with other kinds of contact such as letters, facebook posts, cards, and that kind of thing. I also have to make sure that I am intentional with setting up times and environments that I can talk to students. If you find it hard to talk with students, then that does need to be an area of growth, but perhaps it starts with taking a few students to lunch each week. I would also consider finding some volunteers who are extroverts and can complement your strengths. Hope that things work out. |
